Tuesday evening I had an enjoyable discussion with a great
friend. But the next morning, I awoke comparing our lives. Of course, by
comparing her strengths and successes with my weaknesses and disappointments, I
came up short.
After whining to myself a bit more about what I couldn’t do1,
I decided to take a walk in the rain. It was warm rain, after all. Not long
outdoors before the tone of my internal monologue changed; I began to focus on
the positives more than the negatives.2 I took a photo and, as I watched a gaggle of
geese cross the path before me, found myself thinking how fortunate I am to be
in nature rather than impeded by a silly old job.
As it happens, Wednesday is the evening of the bi-weekly
NAMI meeting in my town. Next I watched a 6 minute Ted TV video in which Joshua
Walters describes the benefits of “just enough” bipolar disorder.3 Saturday,
I biked and bussed my way to yet another NAMI meeting. Sunday I found myself at
a local coffee shop, where I struck up conversation with two men with
motorcycles, at least one of whom is a veteran of the Vietnam Conflict.
When in a fog of self pity, I find it helpful to walk in the
rain, whether that’s literal or a figurative walk with fellow human beings.
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1 The medicine is making it very
difficult to focus on reading or driving; It’s raining out, so commuting by
bicycle is a drag; Without a job, I can’t get what I need or want out of life;
and Blah, blah, blah.
2 I’m walking in warm
rain; it’s not cold rain, snow, or desert. Some people have to deal with the
hassle of a wheelchair, and here I am with the easy fortune a leisurely stroll.
Some women can’t talk a safe walk alone or even alongside a male person. And
etc.
Nice post, and wonderful picture.
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